Going Backwards

Hey.  sorry I haven't posted. I've been doing some overtime at work and that is just knocking me on my butt.   I've been in bed at 7:30PM a few nights, struggling to stay awake.
I didn't even make it to the gym once last week.   As I said, exhausted.

So....
I haven't gotten on the scale lately because that's the last thing on my mind.   However I know I need to really kick it in gear.

We have returned to the one park near us to start walking again. Nothing says out of shape like barely being able to finish one lap.  My back really hurts and I just was pushing it.   This was with us doing the smaller loop. 

We did go again this morning and did the bigger loop, but it was still a chore.   I also feel myself starting to feel like I did when I first got ill 5 years ago.   I ache all over and just am plain exhausted.   Besides heading to bed early, the only difference between this time and last is I'm still fighting.

My back has been acting up on my walks, but I'm pushing through.  I am hoping to make it to the gym again this week.  I need to schedule time with a trainer to focus on some core exercises.

This weekend was warm and sunny so I worked on some of my landscaping. That was a chore -my back aching- and my body just aching in general, but I still did it.   I just need to plant a small tree and find some new lights and I am all done with my landscaping.    So as you see, I am trying to keep myself active.  

It's hard.   I don't know if the feelings I'm having are due to the stress I've been under or something I'm not eating /or am eating.  

Right now for example, I'm just done.   I wanted to go to bed hours ago, but I forced myself to stay up and do something.  I grilled some chicken for dinner.   Just had a bit of OJ that I've been craving.
I hurt all over and just want to stop right where I am.

Being over 40 and trying to lose weight and stay healthy is a struggle.  I'm still fighting and still mad at myself for getting to this point but I'm still fighting. 

I had wanted to walk the pups again today, but I think we're good. They're snoring away next to me and I'm trying to finish this up to crawl into my nice bed.

Step wise, I think I'm around 10K. I haven't hit my 12K goal yet but anything over 10K is good.

Hoping to keep it up this week.  What am I going to do when I go back to classes?  I'm going to be ran ragged.

Just keep fighting I guess...